thanks

The last couple weeks have been a bit like emerging from a darkened room into a sunlit field. These full-of-light experiences have been so few and far between this year that I am truly amazed by the grace with which they suddenly arrive, always apart from my own doing, a mercy-gift.

I have spent a lot of time these last weeks giving thanks and noticing the smallest of graces, as if I have not been able to see in far too long. I'm thankful we finally got pictures hung on our walls a few weeks ago...the tedious 2-day enterprise helped me to reconnect with our family history and regain a vision for who we were and are, and will be. I'm thankful for friends from India who came to visit with us 2 weekends ago. I have not seen them both in 17 summers since we were doing community work in the jungles of Brazil--this was half of my lifetime ago--and their visit, full of heart-talk and tears, helped me to see how my lifepath is still unfolding. Too often this year I've felt that my life ended at Moriah's birth, and re-started since, and the pictures of the wall and dear friends visiting here both helped me to read a continuous, full narrative of my life. There are also very few people whom I have loved as fiercly as I loved this couple, and to welcome them into our home, introduce them to all our children, meet theirs, hear their life story, and feel the connection of following-Jesus-through-angst was a beauty and a delight.

I'm thankful for Moriah's progress this summer. For her sitting up. For her ability now to eat with her own hands (her first do-it-herself dinner was just last night). For her motivation, which outshines her skill level and keeps her learning. I'm thankful for time with our sons. For time to school Jackson each morning (Jason and I are taking turns--I teach ELA Monday and Wednesday mornings, and he teaches math Tuesday and Thursdays). For Orilus' summer school, which gives us the time with Jackson that he really needs. For a neighbor's offer to come and use their pool whenever we want, and time with our kids to do just that. For trips to the library and time to write. For a family to date swap with. For new friendships for the boys. For a new teaching job this fall for Jason, which shortens his commute to 15 minutes. For friends from Lynn who've come to visit. For an opportunity to teach and continue my studies at UMass this fall. For a finished tree house. A lawn to mow. A garden to weed. A house to enjoy. Extended family to see, and love, and be loved by.

Today, I'm giving thanks as I cook meatballs and warm up some lunch for the boys and wait for a sleeping Moriah to stir. Thank you, God, for these simple delights, and a heart that can delight again.